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I know that not many people know this, but before I moved into the commercial sector, I used to teach high school math. Teaching high school math is not as easy as one might think. There are a lot of moving pieces and a lot of students who have different needs and abilities. But there were some things I found myself doing over and over again no matter what class I was teaching or what subject area it was in. I can't point a finger at a single area where I improved, but I remember going through the same process each time which worked for me and eventually got me to a place where I thought, "Okay. Now this is how it's supposed to be." And once you find that process, it works forever. Here are some of the lessons I learned. You may try them out. If you do, I hope that you find that they work for you. Lesson 1: Change. We can't change what's already happened, but we can make things happen differently in the future. If I see one problem or interaction occur on a night out with my friends, on an airplane, on my job, on the subway, I make a note of it and think about how it could be different next time around. If something has happened more than once to the same person or more than once in the same situation, it's probably worth thinking about changing how things are done (or at least finding some new people to hang out with). Lesson 2: Sit With It. If someone else does something to make you feel uncomfortable, try to sit with it. We all have different ways of dealing with things, and some of us are better at "sitting down" and sorting through feelings instead of reacting to things immediately or running away. If I'm feeling anxious and someone does something that makes me uncomfortable, I'll often imagine sitting down and thinking about what's going on inside me — why I'm feeling anxious — what's the nature of the anxiety — and then I'll figure out how to deal with it next time. Hopefully, this will help you work through an issue so that you can move on. It won't solve the issue, but it will make things feel a little better. Lesson 3: Listen. Listening is hard for some people. I know because I used to be one of them. If I'm not sure how to say what I'm trying to communicate or if I feel that something isn't being said clearly enough, then chances are I've listened to the other person's words and failed to hear their actual message. If anything on the other side is unclear, you have two possible moves you can make. First, ask questions so that you get a clearer sense of exactly what they are getting at or about or asking for. cfa1e77820
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